Dieudonné charged with material support for comedy

Gendarmes prepare for Je Suis Dieudonné march

By Kevin Barrett, Veterans Today Editor

So funny he's a threat to public safety.

So funny he’s a threat to public safety.

France’s most popular humorist, Dieudonné Mbala Mbala, has been arrested and charged with providing material support for comedy.

After detaining the French comedian Wednesday at his home in Quenelle-sur-Seine, the French authorities announced that anyone caught laughing at Dieudonné’s performances, whether on youtube, Facebook, twitter, or anywhere else, would also be arrested and charged with providing material support for providing material support for comedy. “And if you think that’s funny, wise guy” added Police Commissioner Jerque Culfoutre, “we’ll arrest you for providing material support for providing material support for providing material support. So don’t try any funny stuff.”

After confining Dieudonné in a laugh-proof cell, the French police cancelled his sold-out comedy tour, citing the need to protect free speech in the wake of the Charlie Hebdo attacks.

“If we let Dieudonné make jokes, and the people laugh, free speech will be finished in France,”  Culfoutre explained.

Asked to explain why Charlie Hebdo’s free speech should be protected by tens of thousands of police and military, while Dieudonné should be banned and imprisoned, French President François Hollande issued a statement:

“Charlie Hebdo is unthreateningly stupid and obnoxious, while Dieudonné is dangerously hilarious. If Dieudonné were allowed to speak, laugh riots would break out; some innocent people might even die laughing. We have a French expression ‘mort de rire’ (MDR) which succinctly summarizes the threat posed by Dieudonné.

“Some members of Dieudonnés audience have actually begged the comedian to stop his rapid-fire gags, protesting ‘stop, you’re killing us!’ Yet Dieudonné keeps right on blasting away with his jokes and endangering public safety.

“Charlie Hebdo poses no such threat. According to painstaking research by our intelligence services, the last time anybody actually laughed at a Charlie Hebdo cartoon was in the spring of 1972, and we blame that incident more on the marijuana the reader was smoking than the magazine itself.”

Hollande told reporters that Dieudonné’s sharp, slashing wit is a dangerous weapon capable of drawing more blood than an AK-47 shot to the head at point blank range. The French President also said Dieudonné provokes powerful explosions of laughter that can turn audiences into helpless blobs of quivering jelly, shake auditoriums to their very foundations, and even threaten to “bring down the house.” He added that while blasphemous, obscene attacks on revered religious figures are  fine, “the right to free speech does not include shouting something funny in a crowded theater.”

In attempts to circumvent the ban on laughing at Dieudonné’s youtubes, the comedian’s fans have taken to guffawing, chortling, cackling, snickering, howling, snorting, and splitting their sides.

Dieudonné supporters have also vowed to hold a Je suis Dieudonné march in support of the gagged and imprisoned comedian. A French official, Ministre de Démarches Rigoleuses Alex Craimant, told Je suis Dieudonné organizers:

“I will grant you the permit to march as much as you want. But there is one condition: You must keep a straight face.”

Craimant said that the marchers will be surrounded by hundreds of thousands of police and soldiers, including elite counterterrorism units with helicopters, drones, RPG launchers, and tactical nuclear weapons, all ready to instantly respond with overwhelming force if any of the participants even cracks a smile.

Related Posts:



The views expressed herein are the views of the author exclusively and not necessarily the views of VT, VT authors, affiliates, advertisers, sponsors, partners, technicians, or the Veterans Today Network and its assigns. LEGAL NOTICE - COMMENT POLICY

Posted by on January 15, 2015, With 9972 Reads Filed under Humor. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.

FaceBook Comments

8 Responses to "Dieudonné charged with material support for comedy"

  1. Bartered  January 17, 2015 at 1:28 am

    Its not the first time the creator of la quennelle was arrested for inciting ridicule for some ambiguous and totally fabricated made up situation for the sole purpose of making the lie a sacred and holy thing. First it was the holohoax. Now it looks like the media gets a new pillar of majestic and sacred holiness to sit on. Anyone caught criticizing the media will be questioned and treated as a criminal, especially if they are making money telling the truth.

  2. Bartered  January 17, 2015 at 1:18 am

    I hate to say this as it may cause a fuss but I think this site and the information on it may be considered something on the side of the fringe element. I’m waiting for the jackets.
    It is odd that the fringe element in this dimension is the one that tries to find the dirt that causes things like wars, famine, pestilence, disease, divorce, and every other problem caused by usury and military conquest and the horrible nasty God awful behaviour of the guys that pull this crap off.

  3. James Robertson  January 15, 2015 at 8:23 pm

    What a brilliant title. How grimly amusing it was to watch the media maggots gloss over the fact that 54 people had just been arrested in free speech France for expressing minority views. Any doubt that our civilisation is on it’s last legs is dispelled by the total blindness we are supposed to have. We are actually expected not to notice that in our despicable culture of hypocrisy you can say whatever you want about Muslims, but god help you if you think you can utter a single word against the Judaics or their apartheid colony. We are simply laughable.

  4. Christina  January 15, 2015 at 7:41 pm

    The French government is completely insane and slaves to the Jews. Time for a new revolution.

  5. Excalibur  January 15, 2015 at 5:00 pm

    When some animals had the audacity to allege that Napoleon the pig in charge was running Animal farm in an unfair manner – and for his own selfish interests – the ‘equality rules of the revolution’ and slogans on the main farm wall were all taken down and replaced with one new slogan: “All animals are equal – but some are MORE equal than others ..”

    George Orwell in his book ‘Animal Farm’ tried to point out how all new world orders with their claims to ‘equality’ eventually end up.

  6. cynthiamaccioli  January 15, 2015 at 2:55 pm

    This is a joke right?

  7. John Simpson  January 15, 2015 at 12:49 pm

    That whole country should be laughing till there sides split. How can a guy say these things without laughing but then he is a cop and he is French.

  8. brubank-guy  January 15, 2015 at 12:44 pm

    Someone wrote somewhere to « be careful n see policy on racyism, buggery & anti-smegmatism ».

    French Prime Minister Manuel Valls, fierce pro-Zionist with Jewish wife Anne Gravoin, denounced Dieudonné M’bala M’bala, calling him a « peddler of hate, and said there should be no confusion between the ‘impertinent’ satire of Charlie Hebdo and ‘anti-semitism, racism and negationism’. » So the vicious anti-Muslim, hate-inspiring bigotry of Prophet Mohammed cartoons, is merely ‘impertinent’ to the no 2 man in France, whereas with regard to Jewish matters …

You must be logged in to post a comment Login


TOP 50 READ ARTICLES THIS MONTH
From Veterans Today Network