Ear-Cutters Cut off Van Gogh’s Cut-Off Ear to Protest Climate Change

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Dissociated Press – Environmental activists blaming Vincent Van Gogh for climate change have mutilated the famous artist’s “Self Portrait Minus Ear” by slashing off part of the canvas with a razor blade.

severed and removed the portion of the painting depicting the bandage that covered the part of the artist’s head where the ear used to be, saying that their act symbolizes the kind of forceful measures that will be needed to prevent humanity from dumping another 2,000 billion metric tons of carbon into the atmosphere.

“We need to cut off carbon with the same resolute spirit Van Gogh demonstrated when he cut off his ear,” explained Blaine “Bubbles” Bubbelsby, self-styled spokesmutilator for the Society of Crazy Art Mutilators (SCAM), a performance art ensemble out of Artyrau, Kazakhstan.

The mutilation of the “mutilation self-portrait” came only hours after activists in New York threw a can of tomato soup at Andy Warhol’s famous “Portrait of a Can of Tomato Soup.”

Bubbelsby explained that by mutilating the craziest paintings in history, thereby proving that they are even crazier than the crazy artists, and possibly almost as crazy as the people who pay hundreds of millions of dollars for the crazy artists’ crazy paintings, the activists hope to garner attention for their cause and use crowdfunding to defray the expense of undergoing psychiatric testing and institutionalization.

Reached at his Penthouse Suite in the Betty Ford Fossil Fuel Addiction Clinic in Rancho Mirage, California, Al Gore lauded the crazy art mutilators and said that if a few more paintings are defaced, humanity’s survival will be virtually assured.

SOURCEDissociated Press

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6 COMMENTS

  1. Confucius postulated 3 modes of knowledge: the second is imitation.
    Experience. In early 1980 I was in London and inside the museum “de quo”. I was in my early twenties and as we were sitting on a marble bench in front of a painting (which I can’t even remember) my friend noticed a white hair among my thick, black hair and she wanted to check if there were more. I bowed my head and she began to check. She had gotten to the third white hair that immediately one of the guards came and invited us out (maybe he thought my friend was spidering me?).
    Whoever smeared the Sunflowers with “Tomato Heinz” and then held a rally without anyone reacting to me represents a concerted Anglo USA scenario.
    To your knowledge for the Zions a Pollock is quoted equal to, or slightly less than, a Raphael; your Gershwin is worth more than Mozart, Beethoven and Puccini who fought it out between the first two. In this way they have destroyed the beautiful and those in Italy who first wrote about these things have been “suicided.”
    Adair is imitation and if after the 16th c.m. of one of my comments he comes to reply on the 18th to me and not on the merits to the article or who what I wrote, my reply (although after moderation) is “logic is the black beast of hypocrites” and that Adair should go and write to his friend Fabio about Wuhan for the Covid and about the cosmic falsehood of “Leonardo Italy Gate” for the Russia gate.
    The king is naked and I am the child who reveals it. Who are you?

  2. You left out the best part of the story . . . these “protestors” glued their hands to the wall and had to be scraped off with Scotland Yard precession and accuracy, before slamming on the cuffs.

    Questions. What did the paintings ever do to them? What did Vicent Van Gogh ever do to them? Did Vincent Van Gogh even use fuel oil in those days? I guess I’m missing the correlation with their protests. These “protestors” got to the National Art Gallery how? By bus? Car? Hmmmm . . . did they drive in an all-electric ride? Because whatever vehicle they rode in on, I’m sure it was gassed up with PETROL. Kinda ironic. Do they realize that SMOG is a by-product of London fog and smoke? Pollution has been in London for a while. They got over it.

    Why weren’t they in the eco-terrorized areas of the world that deplete natural resources and cause massive flooding? The Alps in Switzerland have lost 3 months of “no skiing” because the Alps aren’t snowcapped anymore. Maybe their next stunt can be to glue themselves to the snow when they are sliding downhill on the many frequent Avalanches that are occurring. That’ll help, I’m sure.

    Love the product placement of HEINZ Tomato Soup. What?!? Campbell’s Tomato Soup wasn’t sanctioned as the soup du jour for the protest?

    I’m going to start a protest group: Leave Vincent Van Gogh Alone! Ear today, gone tomorrow.

  3. These climate changer crazies are going from ridiculous to the absurd in their little clown car fast. Before they were just annoying. Now they’ve become totally obnoxious. I’m patiently waiting for the Alliance to pull the pegs on that WEFer circus tent and hopefully let them suffocate on their own CO2 while trees grow in their place.

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